Oh my goodness, I really just made an appointment with an RE. I feel like such a big girl. I feel like I am the senior walking down the hall throwing weak spermies and thermometers against their lockers. I know my OB said if the 2nd SA came back abnormally that she would refer us and we haven't exactly had that test yet.....but I am only being a prepared girl scout. And I solemnly swear that if the 2nd count is more than 5 million I will cancel and wait the full "year of trying".
Yeah right.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
So the MD I work with is having a post coital test today. She too is looking at IUI and IVF but I think it's more because she's 41 and they have been trying for about a year. She's had the HSG and endo bx. I am really curious if they will make me go through all the testing since we know what the problem is. I imagine at least the HSG so they know what kind of shape my tubes are in. I think this is probably wishful thinking that I won't have to endure anything else!
I think I am gearing up to ovulate. Pete and I are giving this one last honest effort on our own. Now, granted if his second swim team analysis scores a medal (I am considering anything above 5 million/ml qualifies for a bronze) we will be trying the old fashion way until our year of trying is officially over. It's so hard to know what to wish for! Do I wish the team gets a gold medal (over 20 million/ml)?? Sure. But if it's going to improve, it better do so exponentially and not just enough to not get us into the RE until January. Part of me hopes that it stays shitty so we can get started with ART this fall and not next winter/spring. Is that wrong? I don't think so. I'm an inpatient girl who's late for a very important pregnancy.
The second SA is in 16 days. Oh what to do to pass the time.... what to do?
I think I am gearing up to ovulate. Pete and I are giving this one last honest effort on our own. Now, granted if his second swim team analysis scores a medal (I am considering anything above 5 million/ml qualifies for a bronze) we will be trying the old fashion way until our year of trying is officially over. It's so hard to know what to wish for! Do I wish the team gets a gold medal (over 20 million/ml)?? Sure. But if it's going to improve, it better do so exponentially and not just enough to not get us into the RE until January. Part of me hopes that it stays shitty so we can get started with ART this fall and not next winter/spring. Is that wrong? I don't think so. I'm an inpatient girl who's late for a very important pregnancy.
The second SA is in 16 days. Oh what to do to pass the time.... what to do?
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Just found 2 new blogs today to follow. Both, of course, fertility related. One of the girls is in the same boat as me, process wise, and the other is now on maternity leave after IVF. Such an inspiration to read. It's so nice to know that other people blog this experience and I am not being some crazy, irrational and dramatic mess. One blog in particular really spoke to me. It's as if every thought she had in the TTC process is one that I have had myself. I almost feel as if someone has wrapped a warm blanket around me, fresh out of the dryer. It's nice to know I'm not alone, even if only connected in the virtual world.
I will end this with some humor; completely stolen from the blogger that I now know hung the fertility blogging moon :)
10 things people say to the infertile couple:
10. Just relax and you will get pregnant: Mmm...true. Stressing out does not improve anything but all the tequila and vacations in the world will not improve my husband's sperm count.
9. I know someone who tried for years and years to get pregnant, adopted and BAM all of a sudden she had a natural pregnancy: Of course you know someone. So does my hairdresser and my cleaning lady's ex-husband's cousin. And no, she didn't BAM all of a sudden get pregnant because you told me she tried for years and years. Maybe she was cool with conceiving at the age of 39, but I'm not.
8. Ugh it sucked we got pregnant the first month. We didn't even get to try. giggle giggle. You didn't even get to try? What happened? Did your husband's penis fall off after you conceived? You can't DO IT when you're preggo? Maybe you should have used a condom if you wanted time trying.
7. OMG I am getting fat. Yup, that's what happens when you get pregnant. You want pity...from me??
6. Being pregnant sucks. You're so lucky. I would kill for a glass of wine. You wanna know what sucks? Spending $11,000 to inject myself daily, harvest my eggs and then hope to God one takes when I put it back it in because that is the only way I will become a Mom. Man, am I lucky I can get drunk though!
5. I know he has a low count but it only takes one sperm! Actually, no, we need millions to do it the old fashion way. We even need millions for insemination.
4. Did you try charting your ovulation? My neighbor's sister tried for 12 months and then used ovulation test sticks and conceived the first month. 1. Your neighbor's sister is obviously dumb. 2. Do you really think I am about to blow $11,000 on the most complicated fertility procedure that exists and not even know if I ovulate?
3. Just wait until you have kids and you'll see. It's not as fun as it seems. They're so much work. Hold the phone! Cancel the cycle! I had no idea kids required patience and hard work. Yuck! What was I thinking!
2. I don't know about all those fertility treatments. Are you sure? You're just going to end up like 6 kids. Yes, I am going to be just like octomom. F-ing idiot.
1. Oh well, just think. If it doesn't work, you can just do it again. You bet. Next time we'll use your visa, ok?
Thank you to Mama2Be. I hope you don't mind that I copied this. It's too good and too true not to share.
I will end this with some humor; completely stolen from the blogger that I now know hung the fertility blogging moon :)
10 things people say to the infertile couple:
10. Just relax and you will get pregnant: Mmm...true. Stressing out does not improve anything but all the tequila and vacations in the world will not improve my husband's sperm count.
9. I know someone who tried for years and years to get pregnant, adopted and BAM all of a sudden she had a natural pregnancy: Of course you know someone. So does my hairdresser and my cleaning lady's ex-husband's cousin. And no, she didn't BAM all of a sudden get pregnant because you told me she tried for years and years. Maybe she was cool with conceiving at the age of 39, but I'm not.
8. Ugh it sucked we got pregnant the first month. We didn't even get to try. giggle giggle. You didn't even get to try? What happened? Did your husband's penis fall off after you conceived? You can't DO IT when you're preggo? Maybe you should have used a condom if you wanted time trying.
7. OMG I am getting fat. Yup, that's what happens when you get pregnant. You want pity...from me??
6. Being pregnant sucks. You're so lucky. I would kill for a glass of wine. You wanna know what sucks? Spending $11,000 to inject myself daily, harvest my eggs and then hope to God one takes when I put it back it in because that is the only way I will become a Mom. Man, am I lucky I can get drunk though!
5. I know he has a low count but it only takes one sperm! Actually, no, we need millions to do it the old fashion way. We even need millions for insemination.
4. Did you try charting your ovulation? My neighbor's sister tried for 12 months and then used ovulation test sticks and conceived the first month. 1. Your neighbor's sister is obviously dumb. 2. Do you really think I am about to blow $11,000 on the most complicated fertility procedure that exists and not even know if I ovulate?
3. Just wait until you have kids and you'll see. It's not as fun as it seems. They're so much work. Hold the phone! Cancel the cycle! I had no idea kids required patience and hard work. Yuck! What was I thinking!
2. I don't know about all those fertility treatments. Are you sure? You're just going to end up like 6 kids. Yes, I am going to be just like octomom. F-ing idiot.
1. Oh well, just think. If it doesn't work, you can just do it again. You bet. Next time we'll use your visa, ok?
Thank you to Mama2Be. I hope you don't mind that I copied this. It's too good and too true not to share.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Stars aligned? Not so much
Not only did that pesky monthly vistor showed her ugly face, Pete's swim team analysis is less than optimal. My OB/GYN didn't fall out on the floor and tell me it wasn't going to happen for us when she saw the results, but she wasn't overly optimistic. She says we have a chance to conceive on our own but it's a small one. So....Pete will have another test done in October and if it's the same or worse, we will be referred to a fertility clinic. Dr. Hoover told me that they can "work with these numbers" and that insemination would likely be the first route.
So now we wait. I'm not very good at this part to I am finding ways to distract myself :)
So now we wait. I'm not very good at this part to I am finding ways to distract myself :)
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
A different look
on the swimteam appointment. I got a smiley face (+ ovulation predictor test) the day after the canceled appointment!!! So after a few days of thinking, I realized this just might have been some divine intervention. If Petey had gone the day before to drop off the boys, there wouldn't have been as many saved up the next day, the day I got the smiley face. And, the day the appintment was rescheduled for just happens to be the day that I can safely take a pregnancy test, if my period doesn't show. Plus!!! Jessica delivered her beautiful baby girl, Lila, on the day I got the smiley face. I know she has been praying a lot for us. So I am thinking the stars just might be aligned for us this time around. I certainly hope so :)
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